Randomness....just randomness

Haven't posted in quite a while.  Needed a distraction and thought of you.  I am quite surprised with how often I find myself wanting to type so many things and when I sit down to actually type something out, I can't find the words to say what I want.  The anniversary of my mother's death is fast approaching and it honestly makes me feel like I'm going crazy.  After 4 years, I still find myself thinking of things I want to share with her, or things I want to buy her.  It's the only reason I hope I leave an impact on someone.  I want someone to miss me as much as I miss her.  Some days I don't think I will have someone like that.  Some days I think I will.  It just depends on my mood, but I sure hope someone misses me when I'm gone.  What else is all this for?